Dear God, I am not where I need to be. I want to be in the place where I want to just be with You. I haven't been there in a long time. You know my fears. You know what holds me back better than I do. Remove all of those things that do. Remove the barriers. Open my eyes to see the opportunity that it is before me. Show me the path that leads to simply wanting to be in Your presence. I know that hear my prayer. I know You see my heart and my mind. You know the weariness. You know about the desire to quit. You know the sense that I cannot fail. You know the pressure I feel. You know that my mind has answer to these things but my heart is not satisfied my the answers. Change this in me. Change this is however You see fit. Open my heart and my mind to the change.
You are God alone. Only You can do this. Only You can take me to the place that I need to be. I trust and believe that You will. I know that You will answer this prayer because You have promised us that You hear and and answer all of our prayers. I may never fully see how You answer and work all of this out but I know that You will. You have to or You are not who You say that You are. My heart cries out to You this night.
As I write this my mind things of so many others who need You. I think of Emily and James, Barb, Josh and Danielle, Brittany, Deanna, Rosie and so many others. You know so much more about them and their needs. Touch them deep in their souls. Draw out the lost to Your side. Bring the wandering back to You their Master just as I know You will bring me back.
God I come before by the only means possible and that is through the shed blood of Christ.
Sunday July 19, 2009
Gracious God, I feel so stretched in so many ways. I feel pulled in so many directions and I barely feel as though I have any energy to move in any direction. I feel so distant from You yet I see You working in very specific ways in my life and in my family's life. I want to be closer to You yet I feel so frail to even begin to do that. I feel as though I am surviving from one day to the next. Some days I feel as though I get so much done and accomplished and then the very next day I can't seem to accomplish anything. I want to work at Wal-Mart yet I don't. Sometimes I want nothing more than to see people though your eyes and sometimes I just want to escape in to a hole somewhere in a corner. I feel so all over the map.
I know You have seen all of this and more in me. I know none of this comes as a surprise to You. I am sure that much of it saddens Your heart. I am so sorry God. My emotions are so jumbled up that I can barely even begin to put words to them. You can see in to my heart far better than I can. Show me what is there. Hear the cry of my heart through the muck and sin. Bring me to that place of rest and peace. I seek Your presence. I have no right except the blood of Christ to even think this a possibility. You have told us that we can have confidence to come before because of Christ blood. I seek to come before with this confidence. I come to simply be in Your presence. I have many things that I want to ask for and seek You for but in the end I that trust being in Your presence is what I need. I trust that You will show me what I need to see and tell me what I need to hear.
I hope that others have not suffered because of my lack of commitment to You. I especially hope this is true of my family though I am sure it is not. Do not punish them for my sins. Angie is so sweet and wonderful God. She works so hard to do what she believes she needs to do. She has worked so hard over the years to meet expectations that I have had of her. She works so hard to simply make sure that our fmily is happy and taken care of. I am sorry for the ways I have viewed her. I am sorry for all of the unnecessary burdens I have placed on her. I know I have no real understanding of what all of them are. God forgive me and show me how to change. Father forgive me for the mistakes I have made with the boys. Forgive me when I have been too harsh and too easily angered by them. This has been especially true with Anthony. I am so sorry. Let him know how sorry I am. God show me how to be fair and true to both of them. I want them to see You in me.
Father heal me in places I do not know need to be healed. Take me to place in my walk with You that are beyond anything I can begin to imagine. Give me the desire to seek You and Your word. Give me a thirsty for knowledge and understand about You that cannot be quenched. I want to learn. I want to see more and more dots connected. I want to see the simple and the dynamic in new and incredible ways. I want to simply know You. I want to be able to rest in Your presence. I want You to be first in my life. I want to be both fearful and confident in Your presence. You are the only one who accomplish this in my life. I look forward to seeing how You will change me and grow me.
God You truly are the great provider.
God You are so much more than I can express. I love You. Thank You for listening to my heart and mind tonight. Thank You for always listening though I do not deserve Your attention. I anticipate Your power and change. Amen.
I know You have seen all of this and more in me. I know none of this comes as a surprise to You. I am sure that much of it saddens Your heart. I am so sorry God. My emotions are so jumbled up that I can barely even begin to put words to them. You can see in to my heart far better than I can. Show me what is there. Hear the cry of my heart through the muck and sin. Bring me to that place of rest and peace. I seek Your presence. I have no right except the blood of Christ to even think this a possibility. You have told us that we can have confidence to come before because of Christ blood. I seek to come before with this confidence. I come to simply be in Your presence. I have many things that I want to ask for and seek You for but in the end I that trust being in Your presence is what I need. I trust that You will show me what I need to see and tell me what I need to hear.
I hope that others have not suffered because of my lack of commitment to You. I especially hope this is true of my family though I am sure it is not. Do not punish them for my sins. Angie is so sweet and wonderful God. She works so hard to do what she believes she needs to do. She has worked so hard over the years to meet expectations that I have had of her. She works so hard to simply make sure that our fmily is happy and taken care of. I am sorry for the ways I have viewed her. I am sorry for all of the unnecessary burdens I have placed on her. I know I have no real understanding of what all of them are. God forgive me and show me how to change. Father forgive me for the mistakes I have made with the boys. Forgive me when I have been too harsh and too easily angered by them. This has been especially true with Anthony. I am so sorry. Let him know how sorry I am. God show me how to be fair and true to both of them. I want them to see You in me.
Father heal me in places I do not know need to be healed. Take me to place in my walk with You that are beyond anything I can begin to imagine. Give me the desire to seek You and Your word. Give me a thirsty for knowledge and understand about You that cannot be quenched. I want to learn. I want to see more and more dots connected. I want to see the simple and the dynamic in new and incredible ways. I want to simply know You. I want to be able to rest in Your presence. I want You to be first in my life. I want to be both fearful and confident in Your presence. You are the only one who accomplish this in my life. I look forward to seeing how You will change me and grow me.
God You truly are the great provider.
God You are so much more than I can express. I love You. Thank You for listening to my heart and mind tonight. Thank You for always listening though I do not deserve Your attention. I anticipate Your power and change. Amen.
Saturday May 16, 2009
Father God, today may be one of those days. On the outside it seems rather dreary and bad. On the other hand it cares with it great potential. This day could turn out to be one of those special days that it not soon forgotten. Or it could become of those days that easily slips in to the back recesses of my memory. For You this is not true. Miraculous things will happen today and You will never forget this day. People will make decisions to follow You. You will be doing and performing all sorts of miracles in people's lives. Help me to see this day as You see it. Open my eyes to see and open my heart to understand. So much drama. Use me as your agent of change in this dark and dying world. I have failed You often. I have neglected so much of what You want me to be doing. I am sorry. I do not want to be that way. I desire to be focusing more and more of my heart and life on You and Your desires for things around me.
There is so much before us. So much potential. So much opportunity. So much heart ache. So much work to be done. Allow me to be Your worker. Give me the strength to accomplish all the work that I am assigned to do. Make my assignments clear and beyond misunderstanding.
You know the desires of my heart deeper than anyone. You know what I need most. Give it to me this day. You are gracious and merciful to hear my prayers. I wait in expectation for the answers. In Jesus name I say and do these things.
There is so much before us. So much potential. So much opportunity. So much heart ache. So much work to be done. Allow me to be Your worker. Give me the strength to accomplish all the work that I am assigned to do. Make my assignments clear and beyond misunderstanding.
You know the desires of my heart deeper than anyone. You know what I need most. Give it to me this day. You are gracious and merciful to hear my prayers. I wait in expectation for the answers. In Jesus name I say and do these things.
Monday May 4, 2009
Father God show me your plans for this day. Show me Your will. Open my eyes to see the path You are creating. You have a reason and a plan for all things. Open the doors and grant me the courage to run through them.
I seek not to be selfish in this moment yet my mind things of all those things which I "need." I do not want to dwell of these things yet my mind always comes back to them. Yet I also know You desire for us to share with You in an open and honest way. Today, I do not feel as though I am in a good place. I feel physically tired. I am stressed. I desire Your rest. I desire to simply desire to rest in your arms. You are gracious and mighty and I know You will supply all that I need for this day. Yet I seek more than that. I desire for You to pour out more than what I need. I seek to live in the abundance of whatever You want to give me. I seek the abundance You can graciously give us.
I pray these things will be the same for my family today. I ask that You would give them more than what they need for this day. That You would provide strength and healing. You would give peace and joy to our home this day. May all of us set our minds and hearts towards you.
I seek not to be selfish in this moment yet my mind things of all those things which I "need." I do not want to dwell of these things yet my mind always comes back to them. Yet I also know You desire for us to share with You in an open and honest way. Today, I do not feel as though I am in a good place. I feel physically tired. I am stressed. I desire Your rest. I desire to simply desire to rest in your arms. You are gracious and mighty and I know You will supply all that I need for this day. Yet I seek more than that. I desire for You to pour out more than what I need. I seek to live in the abundance of whatever You want to give me. I seek the abundance You can graciously give us.
I pray these things will be the same for my family today. I ask that You would give them more than what they need for this day. That You would provide strength and healing. You would give peace and joy to our home this day. May all of us set our minds and hearts towards you.
Monday April 13, 2009
Gracious God, it is amazing to me that You are here in this place. So much that is going on and so many of the people have no relationship with You. They are living their lives and give You no thought. How do I change this? What is my role in changing the hearts and minds of so many. I know ultimately it is You who must change them yet You have chosen to use many to accomplish much of Your work. Show me your will.
Thank You for the time to pray at Waubonsee. You are the Lord of that place and I desire to see You to break forth in a mighty way across that campus. Use those students to change the world for You. Use my family in this adventure and this plan.
I praise You for my family and the love they give me. They are so amazing. Thank You for how Angie takes care of our home. She makes our home a place of rest and a place of joy. Give her the wisdom and strength she needs to teach our boys and lead them closer to You during the day.
I praise You that Aiden wants to tell people the story. That he just tells people without fear or anything. May You develop that in him. May that desire to tell Your story never leave him. Anthony wants to be like his brother yet be his own person. Continue to develop him and mold him in to the person You want him to be.
Thank You for this time to come before You. Thank You for allowing me to watch people and pray for them.
Thank You for the time to pray at Waubonsee. You are the Lord of that place and I desire to see You to break forth in a mighty way across that campus. Use those students to change the world for You. Use my family in this adventure and this plan.
I praise You for my family and the love they give me. They are so amazing. Thank You for how Angie takes care of our home. She makes our home a place of rest and a place of joy. Give her the wisdom and strength she needs to teach our boys and lead them closer to You during the day.
I praise You that Aiden wants to tell people the story. That he just tells people without fear or anything. May You develop that in him. May that desire to tell Your story never leave him. Anthony wants to be like his brother yet be his own person. Continue to develop him and mold him in to the person You want him to be.
Thank You for this time to come before You. Thank You for allowing me to watch people and pray for them.
Monday, March 9, 2009
Gracious God I seek Your presence and peace for this day. So much stress, worry, etc.. is going on around me. I know Your peace is greater than all of these things. Holy Spirit come and grow Your peace in the people who need it.
I praise You for this home and new place to live and serve. The longer we are here the more we can see how You guided us to this place. It may not have been exactly how we envisioned our new home or anything like that but it is how You envisioned it and the longer we are here the more I can see that. It is so amazing to see Your hand at work and how You have started to bring so many wonderful things together. I look forward to meeting the families, dogs, cats and other family pets that live here. I look forward to sharing our lives with them and through that sharing Your word and grace. Show me this day how I can do that. May no opportunity to share Your truth pass by me today.
Angie has done so much to get us settled and I thank You for giving her the strength to do that. I would ask that You reward her sacrifice and hard work. I would also ask that You give her the patience and wisdom she needs today especially when it comes to balancing the work she is doing and taking care of the boys. I praise You for the wonderful life You have blessed us with. You have carried us through some terrible times yet You have also taken us up to some of the highest heights. I do not know what else You have in store for us but I am thankful that You have given Angie to me as someone to spend my life with. I praise You for how You use her to reach people that I cannot. I love how You use her in ways she never thought possible.
The boys have done a pretty good job adjusting to their new life here in Sugar Grove. I know much of this is because of You. Thank You! Thank You for the little ones at Cornerstone. Draw the boys near to Your side. Help them to make the good choices that they need to make. Use them to bring in Your peace.
Use me this day for Your glory and Yours alone. I seek You in Christ name. Amen.
I praise You for this home and new place to live and serve. The longer we are here the more we can see how You guided us to this place. It may not have been exactly how we envisioned our new home or anything like that but it is how You envisioned it and the longer we are here the more I can see that. It is so amazing to see Your hand at work and how You have started to bring so many wonderful things together. I look forward to meeting the families, dogs, cats and other family pets that live here. I look forward to sharing our lives with them and through that sharing Your word and grace. Show me this day how I can do that. May no opportunity to share Your truth pass by me today.
Angie has done so much to get us settled and I thank You for giving her the strength to do that. I would ask that You reward her sacrifice and hard work. I would also ask that You give her the patience and wisdom she needs today especially when it comes to balancing the work she is doing and taking care of the boys. I praise You for the wonderful life You have blessed us with. You have carried us through some terrible times yet You have also taken us up to some of the highest heights. I do not know what else You have in store for us but I am thankful that You have given Angie to me as someone to spend my life with. I praise You for how You use her to reach people that I cannot. I love how You use her in ways she never thought possible.
The boys have done a pretty good job adjusting to their new life here in Sugar Grove. I know much of this is because of You. Thank You! Thank You for the little ones at Cornerstone. Draw the boys near to Your side. Help them to make the good choices that they need to make. Use them to bring in Your peace.
Use me this day for Your glory and Yours alone. I seek You in Christ name. Amen.
Sunday January 25, 2009
Gracious God is it true what I see? Is this how you are answering our prayers? We need to know. We desire to know. I especially need to know if this is Your will or me jumping in too soon. I know nothing is impossible with You. I know You open and shut doors in ways that do not always make sense to us or to the people around us. I know there is a huge part of me that wants this to work out but in a way pleasing and honoring to You. I desire to go and to leave. I desire to be starting new things and doing new things. I only want this in the place and time of Your choosing and not mine. I ask as Solomon did to have Your wisdom. I hang on to the promise that that you hear and answer the prayers of Your people.
I praise You for the ear You give to my words. I am humbled that the God of all creation would even consider hearing what I have to say much less be so involved in my life. You created my bodily form and You recreating the rest of me now. It is an amazing thing. It is amazing to know that You understand cats, dogs, plants, lizards and those things that we seek to understand. You are the one who knows why they make every step they make. You know why they make the choices they make. You alone understand these things. I praise You for that understanding.
Bring Angie and I to the same place on the choices before us. Lay passions upon our hearts. Take fears away. Bring us together in new and exciting ways. I look forward to watching You work in this.
Continue to work in the hearts and minds of the boys. Prepare them for this move and change. Help them to understand. Help them in those moments when they miss the people the care about. I would especially ask that help Aiden deal with leaving school.
You are an amazing God and I praise You for Aiden's 4 years with us. It has been amazing to see how You have done so much in his life. I look forward to seeing You continue to do this.
I praise You for the pretty snow this day. Help us enjoy all that You provide for us. Christ I thank You for saving me and for allowing me to come before the Father in Your name. Amen!
I praise You for the ear You give to my words. I am humbled that the God of all creation would even consider hearing what I have to say much less be so involved in my life. You created my bodily form and You recreating the rest of me now. It is an amazing thing. It is amazing to know that You understand cats, dogs, plants, lizards and those things that we seek to understand. You are the one who knows why they make every step they make. You know why they make the choices they make. You alone understand these things. I praise You for that understanding.
Bring Angie and I to the same place on the choices before us. Lay passions upon our hearts. Take fears away. Bring us together in new and exciting ways. I look forward to watching You work in this.
Continue to work in the hearts and minds of the boys. Prepare them for this move and change. Help them to understand. Help them in those moments when they miss the people the care about. I would especially ask that help Aiden deal with leaving school.
You are an amazing God and I praise You for Aiden's 4 years with us. It has been amazing to see how You have done so much in his life. I look forward to seeing You continue to do this.
I praise You for the pretty snow this day. Help us enjoy all that You provide for us. Christ I thank You for saving me and for allowing me to come before the Father in Your name. Amen!
Tuesday January 6, 2009
Gracious God I look to You and wait. I wait for You to once again open up Your hand and provide for my family. I praise You for the abundance You have poured out upon us. May we always look to You and wait for You to provide. You are so awesome at this and I am always so amazed by it. Today I look to You for provision for travel and new ministry. I believe that if we are to be in Atlanta then You have already composed a plan of provision for this. I also believe that You have a plan of provision for whatever new ministry You have planned for my family. May we earnestly seek to be on the path/plan You have designed.
May You heal Angie. Give her and her body the rest it needs. I praise You for the work You are doing in heart especially with regards to having a little girl someday. It is so awesome to see what You are doing there. I praise You for the love and support she gives me. May I reflect Your love towards her. Show me what she needs me to be to draw her closer to You. Show me what she needs to me to be. Give her the wisdom, strength and whatever else she needs to be the kind of mother You desire her to be. Grant her release for the battles she faces. I would ask that You release her from the prisons she finds herself in some days. She is Your child and I trust You will always take care of her.
I praise You for my two boys. I praise You for the wonderful personalities You are developing inside of them. May they seek after You and Your salvation. May Angie and I always point them towards You. May they receive great rest today. May they learn today. God help/cause Aiden to make the turn in his potty training. It seems as though we were nearly where we needed to be and now it seems as though we have moved backwards. We need to Your wisdom. We seek it from You in this moment. Help him to understand what he needs to do and then to do it. Grant Anthony the sense of security that mommy will return and that it is ok for her to leave. I know it isn't all about security but there is a part of me that thinks that it is. May he become at peace with all of this. Prepare their hearts and minds for the move You seem to be getting us closer to. May they want to move because of You.
There are so many issues and struggles with so many at work. You know each and every one of them. Use me there. Help me to be more willing to be used. Place a fire in my bones about doing Your work and ministry no matter the time or place.
I trust You have heard my prayers. I trust You see them through the blood of Christ and You hear them through the groans of the Holy Spirit. I know not how You will answer all of this things but I know You will and I look forward to watching You do it. May I not miss it and may I praise You for each answer that You give.
May You heal Angie. Give her and her body the rest it needs. I praise You for the work You are doing in heart especially with regards to having a little girl someday. It is so awesome to see what You are doing there. I praise You for the love and support she gives me. May I reflect Your love towards her. Show me what she needs me to be to draw her closer to You. Show me what she needs to me to be. Give her the wisdom, strength and whatever else she needs to be the kind of mother You desire her to be. Grant her release for the battles she faces. I would ask that You release her from the prisons she finds herself in some days. She is Your child and I trust You will always take care of her.
I praise You for my two boys. I praise You for the wonderful personalities You are developing inside of them. May they seek after You and Your salvation. May Angie and I always point them towards You. May they receive great rest today. May they learn today. God help/cause Aiden to make the turn in his potty training. It seems as though we were nearly where we needed to be and now it seems as though we have moved backwards. We need to Your wisdom. We seek it from You in this moment. Help him to understand what he needs to do and then to do it. Grant Anthony the sense of security that mommy will return and that it is ok for her to leave. I know it isn't all about security but there is a part of me that thinks that it is. May he become at peace with all of this. Prepare their hearts and minds for the move You seem to be getting us closer to. May they want to move because of You.
There are so many issues and struggles with so many at work. You know each and every one of them. Use me there. Help me to be more willing to be used. Place a fire in my bones about doing Your work and ministry no matter the time or place.
I trust You have heard my prayers. I trust You see them through the blood of Christ and You hear them through the groans of the Holy Spirit. I know not how You will answer all of this things but I know You will and I look forward to watching You do it. May I not miss it and may I praise You for each answer that You give.
Gracious God I need your special guidance today. I have this need to be doing with people yet I have no way of knowing how to work that out. You have answered my prayer for a fire again and I can feel it rekindling within me again. Is there one place in particular that I am to focus on. I desire to be on the campus so desperately. Show me the campus You want to move me to. I need the wisdom for those right choices. You have me at Wal-Mart now and I desire to know my role there. There are some days it feels as though I am to be reaching out to some there and others it does not. On the other hand I hear so much about blooming where I am planted. Such confusion. I need clarity from You. I need courage from You. I need peace from You. Where is the outlet?????
I pray for good choices and peace in my household today. I desire for Angie's body to be healed and her right should/arm pain to be gone. May our house be as You would have it to be today. May my boys make good choices. Help Aiden to do well with potty training today. May he tells us when he needs to go. May the boys listen. May we have patience. I especially ask this for myself, I need patience with them. Help Anthony to listen and obey.
May Angie and I be able to spend some time together today and may that time be sweet and pleasing to You. May our hearts and minds be in the same place and may we have time today to find that place together. We seek to do Your will. May today not be an elephant day for Angie. I love You and praise You in this moment. I come before in Jesus name. Amen!
I pray for good choices and peace in my household today. I desire for Angie's body to be healed and her right should/arm pain to be gone. May our house be as You would have it to be today. May my boys make good choices. Help Aiden to do well with potty training today. May he tells us when he needs to go. May the boys listen. May we have patience. I especially ask this for myself, I need patience with them. Help Anthony to listen and obey.
May Angie and I be able to spend some time together today and may that time be sweet and pleasing to You. May our hearts and minds be in the same place and may we have time today to find that place together. We seek to do Your will. May today not be an elephant day for Angie. I love You and praise You in this moment. I come before in Jesus name. Amen!
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